my life

"my life"
this life I have
has had no joy
in such a long time,

I barely remember how I was
Or
who that person is...
     ...In that foggy dream
I have had
from a time
that feels so long since passed,

Everything that person was
Seems like something I made up,
Someone that was never really here,
I feel so lost,
I hate the life that I have,
these choices I have made,
Nothing about this reality adds up
To anything for me.

I feel I exist just for the pain I feel,
just to fail again and again,

then to wait for the anguish
of another day
just to fail at the end.
-Armando Torres