I stand here

"I stand here"
I stand here not scared
but
keenly aware I have a color labeled to me,
somewhere in their commentary
color became a way
to buy my attention,
a notion for awareness,
to tell me that they cared,
I stand here not scared
but
exhausted at looking out,
to all these faces and wondering are they racist?
I have gone through most of my life
having to prove
I am not the things they think,
not attached to the colors they see,
I stand here wondering now,
is it too much,
to ask,
for all these faces to prove to me
they are not racist?
There are seams in society
with just enough room to fall in to,
where a few lose their identity
and there is no solace in any narrative,
just the lingering desire,
to want to feel accepted.
-Armando Torres