I Will Not Allow Them...

"I Will Not Allow Them..."

I lie about my dreams,

about what I actually see,

What I tell you

is not what is true,

There are things about me

that have deformed me underneath,

Things that have broken me,

     gnarled and chewed on me,

left me in pieces

to be bandaged and stitched

back together,

I will never be

a natural fit forever,

Parts of me are ugly

     and others misshapen,

Pieces put back in the wrong place

     forming the wrong shapes,

I'm not a natural fit for anything,

Nature has abandoned me

leaving me with this reflection

     of deformed wounds,

I would not want you to know the truth,

That is why I lie about my dreams to you,

I would rather have you believe

that I am your pure reflection

of love,

Instead

of this horrid, gnarled, deformed

imperfection of me,

Whatever I would have been

was spent

long before now,

No one will ever know me in the end

because I will not allow them.

-Armando Torres