Early Mornings

"Early Mornings"

I sit in the quiet darkness 

     of morning 

reminiscing,

The birds begin to sing their songs, 

     chirping their lyrics from the power lines,

The dark blues start to give way 

     to the warm hues of sunrise,

So many moments 

swell behind my weary eyes 

as I drink my coffee in the morning,

     remembering faded glimpses of my youth,

Time has washed away 

everything of worth and has left

the wreckage of a life 

     held together by only memories,

So many regrets, 

     so many thoughts both happy and wretched,

It's too much in the morning some days,

     too much to look in the mirror at my face

     and see my hollowed out eyes

     surrounded by circles

of dark shades of grey skin tones,

Too much to feel every ache and pain 

     of memory 

     in my bones,

To feel every ragged and worn out pull of my joints,

Too much to hear every echo of thought from years gone,

So I grab the bottle of vodka and serve a glass over ice,

It's only half passed nine and already I can't handle life.

-Armando Torres

In The Corner

"In The Corner"

At the end of every day I am reminded you are not here anymore,
Every time I see your side of the bed I feel this hole again,
     a missing piece ripped from me,
In the morning making my coffee
     I forget to make just enough for myself,
Instead
     I go and make breakfast for the both of us,
          As if you were still here,
I set your eggs and bacon with toast and coffee on your side of the table,
     I eat my meal as I choke down tears,
I thought I heard you call my name the other day,
     a hint of a whisper or perhaps just the wind,
All the rooms feel so suffocating without you,
     I find no solace in the light the day brings,
The silence that lingers in this house crushes my strength,
     I look at the empty spots you used to sit in and read,
The backyard bench we'd sit in and watch the leaves flutter and fall,
     I don't know if I can anymore,
          I don't know...
However,
     I thought I heard you whisper my name the other day,
          I thought I saw you in the other room as well,
I see you everywhere now,
     in every room of this house,
I now wait for the day to fade to night
          because the dark doesn't feel empty anymore,
There's something there now inside of it,
          Something lingering in the corner,
I don't feel so alone in the dark,
          I lay myself down on my side of the bed,
I just hope it's you in the corner.
-Armando Torres