"With or Without"
When was the last time
I even looked up at the sky,
took a moment
for myself
and really existed away
from memory
to enjoy
what I actually see,
to really be
present
away from all the pain
and all the hurt,
without all the burdens,
I can't even remember
what that felt like,
to look at the trees
and have my mind
blend into the vibrant hues
of browns and greens,
to see the baby blue sky
right behind
the swaying leaves,
to feel life
move around me
as I breathe in
the crisp fresh air,
I can't even say when
the last time
the world existed for me
in that kind of capacity,
it's all tones
of gray and muted colors,
dull pain
and counting dollars,
going to work
and grinding through
the stress of another day
that doesn't look
anything like I remember,
And Perhaps,
in the end,
I am the memory,
and world is there,
just like it always has been,
with or without me.
-Armando Torres
