These Eyes

"These Eyes"
I've been told 
the brown of my eyes 
are like charming
pools of amber honey 
shimmering in the sunlight,

That they have 
   a glossed sheen to them
reflecting shimmering 
golden points 
of light,

But no one sees 
the glimmering beauty 
in my eyes
for the pain 
it really is,

I've been told 
there is a kindness there;

And perhaps there is
   but one quick look 
   behind the almond veil
and one will see 
despair 
as deep as my soul goes,

The thin shine of kindness 
at the corners of my eyes
are to fool the world 
that I am okay
   but in reality its like
I'm standing in the middle 
of a crowded room
screaming with my mouth closed
hoping no one will see through
the glazed over façade 
and presume 
they understand
the misery I am going through;

But I've been told
the auburn in my eyes
have a kind of warmth to them,
   so I know I have fooled
   the world once again.

-Armando Torres

Cessation of rest

"Cessation of rest"
There's a midnight sting in my eyes
that lingers there 
for the whole day,
   paranoid of what my face
   might say 
   about it
   to those who are looking,
I instead
bare my teeth
as friendly as can be
and hope no one asks 
what I did last night,

Because in truth 
it was just another slog 
through insomnia and anxiety,
   another 3 or 5 am sleep time
   through all the canyons and valleys
   of a never resting mind,

Hoping 
for just some sort of simple respite
from all the heaviness 
that exists in my life,
   but usually 
   what happens
   is just another long night 
   like all the ones before
plucked
   from what feels like 
   an infinite supply,
like a long line 
of reflections of mirrors
that never end,
   just to trudge through them
   and do it all over again.

-Armando Torres